A Pirate of her Own Page 18

  After greeting Jake, Robert had led them to waiting coaches which had taken Morgan, Serenity, Jake, and Barney up to his Grecian-style plantation home named La Grande Maison. Robert had introduced her to his wife, Martha, and his youngest daughter, Kristen, before the men had retired to his study.

  Martha, who was probably a good ten years younger than Robert, had laughing blue eyes and light auburn hair. She was short and plump, and vivacious. But there was something more than that, a cheery happiness that ran so deep in Martha’s personality that all a person had to do was look at her to feel happy.

  And Martha had an uncanny ability to read people. She’d no more than just met Serenity before she ordered a bath be drawn and urged Serenity upstairs to rest.

  Now Serenity stood inside an upstairs bedroom looking out on the weeping willows and Spanish moss that lined the drive.

  Kristen, who was around Serenity’s age, directed the servants to fill the tub and prepare her bath like a military drill instructor. Though slight of stature like her mother, and with the appearance of a fragile china doll, Kristen was not a woman to be taken lightly. Once she donned the cap of commander, Serenity doubted if anyone possessed the backbone to stand up to her.

  Serenity tuned out Kristen’s commands while she thought about Morgan’s disclosure of being married to Robert’s eldest daughter, Teresa.

  This had once been Morgan’s wife’s home, and Serenity couldn’t help wondering how much he had loved Teresa. What they had shared, and what memories this house stirred within him.

  “Miss James,” Kristen called, “your bath is ready and we’re waiting to help you undress.”

  “Thank you,” Serenity said, pulling herself away from her thoughts.

  A light blue cambric dress had been brushed and was lying on the bed.

  “I thought the color would bring out your eyes,” Kristen explained. “It was part of a shipment that Father purchased just last week.”

  “It’s beautiful. Thank you.”

  “Miss James?” Kristen asked as she moved closer to her.

  “Call me Serenity, please.”

  Kristen nodded. “Serenity, I know we just met, but I can’t help noticing that something seems to be the matter. Would you like a sympathetic ear?”

  How could she possibly broach this topic with Kristen?

  “It’s about my sister and Morgan, isn’t it?”

  Serenity chewed her lip, not really wanting to talk about this. Yet she needed to. “He loved your sister very much, didn’t he?”

  Kristen gave her a comforting squeeze. “Do you want the truth?”

  “Please.”

  Kristen dismissed the servants and quietly shut the door before she turned back to face Serenity. “Teresa was in love with another man,” she confessed in a low tone. “He was a local farmer’s son, and she used to sneak out every night to meet with him.”

  Serenity gasped. That was the last thing she’d expected Kristen to say.

  Kristen’s eyes turned dark and sad, and tears misted in her eyes. “My parents didn’t know at the time, and I had promised her I wouldn’t tell. You’ve no idea how many times since her death I wished to God that I had told them. That I had stopped her from doing something so terribly foolish.”

  Kristen looked away from her. “They saw each other for a few months and then Teresa learned…well, she was in the family way.”

  Serenity frowned. “I don’t understand.”

  Kristen bit her lip as if debating something. She finally continued, “I guess I should explain everything from the beginning. All this mess started with Morgan.”

  “With Morgan?”

  “Aye. When Morgan found his sister, he didn’t know where to take her. Penelope had caught a terrible disease and she would fly into fits of rage. Morgan brought her here because my mother was the only person he knew who had experience dealing with people like her. But it was too late. The disease was incurable and so my mother and Teresa did their best to make her comfortable.”

  Kristen swallowed. “Teresa befriended her, loved her like a sister, and she helped Penelope live out her final days in quiet dignity. So later, when Morgan found out what had happened to Teresa, and the fact that the man who did it had run off to sea and abandoned her, Morgan insisted she marry him.”

  She met Serenity’s gaze. “You can’t imagine how upset Teresa was. She knew Morgan didn’t love her and she didn’t love him, but she agreed for the baby’s sake.”

  Her face sad, Kristen folded her hands in front of her. She went to stand in front of the open windows and looked out across the lawn. “Morgan, bless his heart, tried to settle down here with her. He used to sit out on the dock for hours at sunset watching the tide come in. You could read on his face how much he missed the sea. How much he wanted to return to it. But he stayed here, by Teresa’s side, until she begged him not to worry over her. She told him that she would be fine and that he should go back to sailing. He didn’t want to at first, but my father also encouraged him. When he left, he promised Teresa he would be back in time for the baby’s birth.”

  It was all starting to make sense to Serenity. “He didn’t make it.”

  “No,” she said with a shake of her head. “She died shortly after giving birth.”

  “And the baby?”

  “Stillborn.”

  “Oh, Kristen, I’m so sorry.” Serenity moved to her side and hugged her close.

  Kristen patted her on the back. “It’s all right. I like to think that Teresa finally found peace. She was so unhappy those last few months. Every night she would cry herself to sleep and I could hear Morgan pacing the floor outside their room. He had no idea how to make Teresa feel better. Broken hearts are hard to heal.

  “I just wish Morgan could find peace as well,” Kristen whispered. “He blamed himself for not being here with her when she died.”

  Kristen pulled away and went to place towels around the bathtub. “But I’m glad to see him happy with you,” she said, looking up, her eyes sincere. “So tell me, when do the two of you plan to marry?”

  Serenity was so startled that she couldn’t even speak for several seconds.

  When she finally found her voice, it came out as a small croak. “I beg your pardon?”

  Kristen smiled. “Don’t be so alarmed. I loved Teresa, but I love Morgan too, and all I want is for him to be happy. I’m glad he found you.”

  “No, no, no,” Serenity said hastily, wondering what had made her jump to that conclusion. “We aren’t planning marriage. In fact, I plan to buy passage from this island back home while he continues on.”

  Kristen straightened up from the tub with a deep frown creasing her brow. “But I thought—”

  “Morgan and I barely get along,” Serenity said in a rush. “We fight over everything.”

  A knowing smile curved her lips. “He makes you insane, doesn’t he?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “And you love to irritate him? Live for it, in fact?”

  Now Serenity frowned. Did Kristen possess second sight? “How did you know?”

  Her smile widened and she gave a light laugh. “I feel the same way about my husband.”

  “I didn’t know you were married.”

  “For six years now,” she said. “It was love at first sight. The moment I saw George, I knew he was the one for me. You feel the same for Morgan. I saw it on your face downstairs when you arrived.”

  “Nay, really, I couldn’t love Morgan. He’s a pirate.”

  Kristen shrugged as if the matter was completely unimportant. “So was George. So was my father. Men do many things that they later regret. Even at his worst, Morgan was never as bad as many others I’ve met. In fact, I’ve known so-called privateers and naval officers who were far more cruel than even Jake. And believe you me, there are times when Jacob Dudley could give the devil himself a run for his money.”

  That was a statement Serenity didn’t doubt.

  Kristen moved to her stays and start
ed unlacing Serenity’s dress. “What’s in a man’s past doesn’t matter nearly as much as what’s in his present, and most importantly, what’s in his heart. Morgan loves you,” she said, stepping around to where Serenity could see the bright earnestness of her gaze. “I’ve never seen him stare at a woman the way he does you. His hand even lingered at your waist before you followed me up here.”

  Serenity laughed. “You don’t miss anything, do you?”

  “Not much. My mother calls it my own special curse.” She circled around Serenity. “Tell me, if he had never been a pirate, how would you feel about him?”

  Serenity bit her lip as she thought the matter over. “He is handsome, isn’t he?”

  “As sin itself.”

  “Charming,” she said with a wistful sigh.

  “Absolutely. Don’t forget debonnaire, kind.”

  Serenity barely heard the words as she continued to tally Morgan’s finer points. “He makes me laugh when I’m not angry at him.”

  Kristen tsked. “Oh, sweet. It’s too late for you. It’s true love if ever I’ve seen it.”

  Serenity shook her head in steadfast denial. “Oh, I don’t know if I believe in true love anymore,” she said with a sigh. “There was a time, not long ago in fact, that I believed in romantic fairy tales, but these last few weeks I’ve learned that life—that people, aren’t the way I want them to be. They are the way they are, and no amount of wishing will change that.”

  “Yes,” Kristen said lifting her brows, “but we don’t choose whom we love with our heads, we choose with our hearts.” She lightly touched the area on Serenity’s chest where her heart pounded in spite of her denials. “We love in spite of faults and sometimes because of them. Correct me if I’m wrong, Serenity, but when you’re around Morgan do you feel breathless?”

  “Oh, yes.”

  “Jittery?”

  “At times.”

  “Do you find yourself begging for his mere touch?”

  Serenity’s face flooded with heat. How could she ever admit that out loud?

  “So you do.”

  “Well, what has that got to do—”

  “It means you’re in love, Miss James. The next question is, what are you planning to do about it?”

  Chapter 14

  What was she going to do about it? That was the question that had haunted Serenity throughout her bath.

  Kristen should have been an interrogator or a solicitor, with her ability to strip back delusions and reveal the truth.

  What could she say? The woman was incredibly sharp of mind. And the only way Serenity had gained peace was by pleading a headache.

  Now alone in the room, dressed in the blue cambric and sitting on the fainting couch in front of the open windows, Serenity allowed her thoughts full rein.

  She was in love.

  The truth of it had hit her hard, and yet she wondered how she could have been so blind to the truth all this time.

  Why else would she have even cared about his past?

  It certainly wasn’t because she’d written a silly old legend only to learn that legend was a man.

  It was because she felt deceived by the man she had given her heart to.

  “What am I going to do?” she murmured to herself.

  She toyed with the purse of money that rested in her lap. Mr. Rodale had given it to her to buy safe passage home. The faded brown leather pouch was threadbare and ragged around the edges. From the moment he’d given it to her, she’d felt guilty. But at the time, she’d been desperate to leave. And she’d promised to get his money to him as soon as she returned home. Of course, she didn’t really know how to do that, since he would be at sea.

  But she would have been home.

  Home.

  The word was so sweet. She would see Honor and Jonathan and her father. Douglas.

  She smiled.

  But she would never again see Morgan.

  Closing her eyes, she remembered the feeling she’d had the day in the shop when he’d swept into her life like the phantom she’d written of in her story.

  The feeling she’d had the night he’d shown up at her party to seek her out.

  But most important, she remembered the feeling she’d had that night after he left her in the library—that she’d slammed the door on some kind of opportunity.

  Morgan.

  He was her knight in shining armor. Her dashing pirate prince who…

  Who could break her heart by refusing her love.

  It should be easy! she lamented to herself. She should be able to go downstairs this instant and say, Morgan Drake, pirate or not, I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

  But it wasn’t that simple.

  Nothing in life was ever that simple.

  “Good Lord, what if he laughs in my face?” she whispered.

  He might. And who would blame him? Here she was, some boyishly framed miss who needed glasses to read and who spoke words of social reform. A woman who made him mad enough to chop down his own door.

  He’d probably had lots of women throw themselves at him. Lots of beautiful women. Sophisticated, know-their-place women.

  And not one of them had ever been able to hold on to him. Their failure gave her little hope.

  “Oh, Morgan,” she whispered to herself. “If only I knew how you really felt.”

  La Grande Maison had been fashioned after the large homes of Virginia that Robert had admired in his youth. After years of fruitful piracy, and his winning hand of poker, Robert had decided to settle down on Santa Maria, and set his sights on the daughter of a local official.

  Once Martha’s father had seen the house Robert was building, he’d quickly given his daughter over for a hefty slice of Robert’s wealth. She had been less than pleased with her father’s choice of husband.

  Luckily, Martha’s upset at her father hadn’t lasted. In no time, Robert had won over his new bride.

  In all the years Morgan had known them, they had always been happy with each other.

  The only thing Robert valued more than this house and his wife were his two daughters.

  Morgan sighed at the memory of Teresa. She’d been a beautiful girl with long blond hair and a sweet, docile disposition. Like her mother, she had never said a cross word, and she’d had an enchanting smile.

  But her smile had never made him quiver the way Serenity’s did.

  And in spite of his best intentions toward Teresa, Morgan had never loved her. The truth of that cut him deeply.

  In spite of his heart, he had tried to be a good husband to her, but the lure of the sea had been too much.

  Now, full circle, he stood in this same house waiting for the rustle of a feminine hem to herald the approach of a woman he was desperate to see. Twelve years ago he had been nervous to propose to Teresa. The words had even hung in his throat. It had only been by sheer will that he’d finally uttered them.

  Now he wanted to see Serenity.

  Morgan looked up the stairs for what seemed like the millionth time. For half an hour he’d been waiting in the large, open foyer. A split staircase curved up to the next floor. A floor where she waited.

  Where was Serenity?

  He grunted at the unintended double entendre. His serenity had left the moment he met her. Just what sort of name was “Serenity” for a woman who brought him anything but peace?

  Fate was surely laughing at him.

  “Morgan? Are you all right?”

  He turned at Kristen’s voice as she entered the foyer from the French doors that led out to the gardens.

  “I’m fine.”

  “Then why are you pacing?”

  “I’m not pacing.”

  She cocked an amused brow.

  Forcing himself to stop, he crossed his arms over his chest. “Don’t you have something more important to do than spy on me?”

  A calculating look darkened her eyes. “Well, as a matter of fact, I do. I was actually on my way to tell Miss James that a trade ship ju
st came into port that is bound for the Colonies.”

  He felt his face blanch, and if he hadn’t known better, he’d have sworn Kristen enjoyed seeing it.

  “If you’ll excuse me…” She picked up the hem of her dress and started up the stairs.

  “Wait!” he snapped before he could stop himself.

  She turned about, her eyes wide with innocent questioning. “Yes?”

  Morgan debated what to say. He wanted to go upstairs and beg Serenity not to go. He wanted her to stay with him.

  His mind hurriedly searched for a logical reason for him to feel that way. A reason he could accept. One he could live with. And he finally realized what the reason must be.

  It was his duty to see her home safely.

  Yes, that was it.

  It was his duty!

  Why should she buy passage when he could transport her for free?

  Then another thought struck him. “Where did she get money for passage?”

  Kristen shrugged. “Maybe she pirated it.”

  “You’re not funny, Kristen.”

  “That’s a matter for debate. Now if you’ll excuse me, I really must deliver my news. Unless…”

  “Unless what?” He prayed the desperate hope he felt wasn’t etched onto his face.

  “Oh, never mind.” And with that she turned around and flounced up the stairs.

  Kristen paused on the second floor and peeked back to where she’d left Morgan. He looked so angry that for a moment she thought he might actually come up after her.

  “You’re a stubborn, stubborn man, Morgan Drake,” she whispered. “And I pity poor Serenity for having to put up with you.”

  Of course, her own mother-in-law had said the same thing to her when she married George.

  Men were never easy, especially not when you loved one. As her mother had told her on her wedding night, the first two years of marriage a wife will want to devour her husband. After that, she’ll wish she had.

  Kristen snickered. There were times when that was definitely true, but she also knew the pain of letting go someone you loved and the fear of never finding them again.