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Page 22

His tone was curt and cold. "I'll live."

  Whatever was wrong with him?

  She glanced back to where Ryan was glaring at Ewan.

  Surely Ewan didn't think…

  Nay. Ewan had to have more sense than that. He couldn't be jealous over Ryan the Toad. Surely he realized the only reason she'd gone to Ryan was that she was relieved he hadn't died because of her.

  Nora started for the front of the wagon.

  "You need to be in the back, Nora," Ewan said sharply. "We'll move quicker that way."

  "How so?"

  "Just get in the back." His gruff tone offended her. She hadn't seen him like this since the first day they'd been together.

  Where was her gentle bear?

  Her feelings hurt, she did as he said.

  Fine. If he wanted to go off and sulk, so be it. They'd have to stop soon and eat. By then he should be more level-headed and she would check and clean his wound then.

  If he wanted to be a baby until then, so be it.

  Viktor went to ride with Ewan while she, Catarina and Ryan rode in the back.

  As soon as they were settled inside, Ewan clicked at the team of horses and got them into motion.

  "How did you find Ryan?" Nora asked Catarina as they took comfortable positions on the wagon's floor.

  "He came out of the tavern wounded and was babbling for someone to help him get to you."

  Nora could imagine what a spectacle Ryan must have been. The man hated to make a scene more than anything and yet he had made one for her. It was probably the kindest thing Ryan had ever done for anyone. She might not like him, but that went a long way in assuaging some of the nastier things he had done to her over the years.

  "Thank you, Ryan."

  He inclined his head to her. "I'm just sorry I wasn't more adept at protecting you to begin with. Believe me."

  "But at least you tried."

  Ryan was silent while Nora talked to Catarina about what they should do to avoid the MacKaids and every other topic.

  Ryan lay back in the wagon, moaning every time he took a breath about how much pain he was in and how neither of them understood the grueling misery that was his stomach.

  Nora didn't comment. Instead, her thoughts were on the man who was driving the wagon. The one whose side was unstitched and whose wrists were still raw.

  The man who said nothing at all about his pain.

  Inside or out.

  They rode for hours without stopping to break their fast. It was almost midday before Ewan finally reined the horses.

  He helped Nora down, then left Catarina for Viktor.

  Nora tried to speak to him, but Ewan refused.

  Without a word or backward glance, he returned to the horses to care for them.

  Angry at his behavior, Nora went to him. "Why are you being so cold toward me?"

  "I'm not being cold toward you."

  "Nay? Then why do I get a shiver every time you meet my gaze? Or should I say when you meet my gaze, which all of a sudden isn't often."

  He glanced past her shoulder to where Ryan watched them with an arched, curious brow. "Ryan is wounded. You need to see to him."

  Understanding floored her. "You're jealous?"

  "I'm not jealous, Nora. Believe me."

  "Then what are you?"

  "I'm angry."

  Ewan clenched his teeth, unable to believe he'd allowed that to escape.

  "What have you to be angry over?"

  Fate. Destiny.

  Everything that kept him from being able to claim her for his own.

  Everything that made Ryan more appealing to her than he was.

  "Just leave me alone."

  She reached to touch him.

  Ewan wanted that touch so badly that for a moment, he couldn't move.

  He waited for it. Desperate. Needful.

  But he had no right to that, either.

  He moved away from her.

  "Ewan, please speak to me. Don't push me away."

  Though it ruptured his heart, Ewan ignored her plea. He had to.

  If he didn't…

  He brushed past Ryan roughly, and went to tend private matters in the forest.

  Nora watched Ewan leave and felt a profound urge to follow after him and beat him with a branch until he shaped up and talked to her.

  "He loves you."

  She blinked at Ryan's voice. "What did you say?"

  "He loves you, doesn't he?"

  "What makes you think that?"

  Ryan sighed. "The expression on his face when he looks at you and the hatred in his eyes when he walked past me just now. I half expected him to strike me."

  Nora gazed at the forest where Ewan had vanished. How she wished she could see inside his heart for a minute to find out how he felt about anything. "I know not what he feels. I only know he is a stubborn, aggravating man."

  "A stubborn, aggravating man that you're in love with as well."

  She frowned at Ryan.

  "Don't bother lying, Nora," he said gently. "I've known you every day of your life. There's something about you that brightens whenever he's near you."

  She scoffed at the very idea. "There is not."

  "Aye, but there is. You fair glow with it." A muscle worked in Ryan's jaw. "You never glow around me unless it's your face turning red because you're angry at me."

  "Then will you forget our betrothal?"

  Ryan's face hardened, and when he met her gaze, the steely, determined look made her heart ache.

  "I can't, Nora. I'm in debt too deeply. Some of these men will kill me if I don't pay what I owe. I'm sorry."

  She looked away as her heart broke a little more. "So am I, Ryan. So am I."

  It took them three days to make it to Lochlan's keep. Ewan didn't speak to her at all, even though Nora did everything she could to engage him in conversation.

  He wouldn't even look at her.

  He acted as if she didn't exist at all, and every time he refused to address her or even look at her, her heart ached more. What would it take to make the man be reasonable again?

  "Nay," Catarina had said when she had told the gypsy of her feelings. "He acts as if the sight of you is more than he can bear. He knows Ryan has a claim on you, and it's tearing him apart."

  Nora prayed that wasn't true.

  But in the event it was, she set about making Ryan's life miserable. She chattered endlessly every time he came near her. She played her lute until he begged and threatened her to stop. She did everything she could think of to unnerve him.

  And more times than not, she would send Ryan off in a hurry within minutes of his drawing close to her.

  "Release me from the betrothal," Nora had asked him repeatedly.

  His only answer was the ever steadfast "I can't."

  And so it went until she was ready to scream.

  Now as they neared the end of the journey, she watched Ewan atop the wagon while she rode on a horse beside him. He kept his eyes focused straight ahead, and yet she had a sneaking suspicion that he knew exactly where she was and what she was doing.

  "I suppose you'll be glad to be rid of me," she said to him as he tried to ignore her. "You'll be able to go back to your cave now."

  He didn't respond.

  "I'll be glad to have a bed again," Ryan whined from where he rode behind her. "I fear my stomach has been damaged eternally. This pace the last few days has nigh killed me."

  'Twas a pity Lochlan lived so close.

  Nora! She chastised herself.

  How uncharitable!

  It was, but at the same time, she couldn't bring herself to feel more kindly toward the man who was about to ruin her only chance at happiness.

  She'd lost one man to another woman.

  Now she was going to lose Ewan because of his honor.

  Och, men and their honor. They were quite beastly about it when they wanted to be. Oh for the day when they would let love rule them and not their stupid code of nobility.

  She sighed wist
fully as she watched him.

  Please, God, please help him to see that I need him as much as he needs me.

  They rode silently through the gates of Lochlan's castle, only to be pulled into full-scale pandemonium.

  Her parents, Lysander, Pagan, Bavel and Ewan's entire family were all gathered in the bailey, and not a one of them looked any too pleased.

  Nora wanted to turn her horse about and ride straight to England alone.

  Only the fact that they closed the gate behind her kept her from it.

  She could tell by the tenseness of Ewan's body that he had much the same inclination, but true to his character, he headed straight for the maelstrom.

  On the steps outside the castle's door was a short, dark-haired woman who looked so much like Ewan that Nora was certain it was his mother. Two black-haired men flanked her, and by their heights and proximity to the woman, she assumed them to be two of Ewan's brothers.

  One was dark and deadly, his stare sinister. Judging by rumor, she would assume him to be Sin MacAllister, who had married the lairdess of the MacNeely clan. A beautiful redheaded lady stood beside him. Her noble stance confirmed her station. No doubt she was Caledonia of the Clan MacNeely—a distant cousin to Nora whom she had never met.

  The other dark-haired man was so handsome that to look at him was to ache. He was truly perfection, and the woman to his side was surrounded by children. Her red hair wasn't as vibrant as Caledonia's, and her features leaned toward plainness.

  But when she nudged Braden and he looked to her, the love on his face said that he thought her to be the most beautiful woman on earth.

  It made her own heart ache. Not long ago Ewan had held such a look when he glanced at her.

  Catarina gave a low whistle. "Who is that man standing next to Alex?"

  Nora looked to her father and saw the man Catarina had noticed. He was tall, blond and extremely handsome.

  Frighteningly so.

  "That be my brother Lochlan," Ewan answered for her. "Sin is to the right of my mother, who is on the steps, and Braden to the left. Braden's wife, Maggie, is the lass surrounded by children, and Caledonia, Sin's wife, is by his side."

  Nora was pleased that she had pegged them correctly.

  "You have brothers most handsome, Ewan," Catarina said, her voice filled with awe.

  "So they tell me."

  Nora realized that for the first time in days, Ewan was watching her.

  He drove the wagon to the steps, then stopped and locked the wooden brake.

  As soon as she reined her horse in, her father and mother came rushing to her side. Even though she was frightened by what might happen, she was glad to see her parents again.

  "Are you all right?" her father asked as he helped her from her horse. His handsome brow was crimped with worry as he ran his gaze over her as if seeking an injury.

  Nora soaked in the sight of her father. He was only slightly taller than she, with a stout build. His thick beard was the same golden blond as his hair and his brown eyes managed to look both relieved and angry.

  "I am fine, Father. Truly."

  He pulled her from the saddle, gathered her into his arms and held her closely. Nora was speechless. It was so unlike her father to ever be emotional. He'd always acted as if she were a fragile flower who would be crushed by his touch.

  And crushed by his touch was definitely how she felt at present.

  Her mother's pale blue eyes were filled with tears as her lips trembled. "Welcome home, precious," she said, removing Nora's father from her and grabbing her into a hug of her own.

  Then, to her further astonishment, her father turned toward Ryan, who had dismounted and ambled over to them.

  He glared at him, and for a minute she thought him angry. Then his face softened. "And you, lad, I was completely wrong about you."

  To her utter stupefaction, he embraced Ryan like a long-lost son and pounded him on the back.

  Ryan choked and sputtered as if unable to withstand her father's strength.

  Still her father pounded on him. "Lysander told me how you were almost mortally wounded for my Nora. Thank you."

  Nora looked at Ewan, whose face was unreadable. At least to anyone other than her. She saw the tightness around his lips. The emptiness of his eyes.

  Without a word, he climbed down from the wagon and headed for the donjon.

  His mother spoke to him, but he ignored her and kept walking.

  His brothers fell in behind him, and none spoke while she was barraged with questions from her parents, and Lysander, Pagan and Bavel greeted Catarina and Viktor.

  Ewan needed a drink. A large one.

  But in his heart, he knew it would take more than an ocean of ale to drown the pain he felt.

  "What happened, Ewan?" Lochlan asked from behind him.

  "Nothing." He stopped at the cabinet outside the pantry and pulled out a pitcher of ale, along with a goblet.

  He cursed as he saw every member of his family behind him. His mother's face was worried and pinched while his brothers all looked ready to fight him.

  His sisters-in-law excused themselves and made for the stairs.

  Grateful for their kindness, Ewan poured himself a drink.

  "Nothing?" Braden repeated. "Alexander Canmore has been here for two days now wanting to know what you've done with his daughter. He's been threatening war and dismemberment at every turn should she not appear unscathed, and yet you say nothing happened."

  Ewan downed the goblet of ale, poured more, then turned and glared at Braden before he downed the second cup. "I don't want to hear it from a man who tricked his daughter and then forced her to run to me. If Alexander was so worried for her welfare, he should have kept her home where she belonged."

  "What are you saying?" Lochlan asked, his face skeptical.

  Ewan gestured angrily with his goblet toward the door. "It's true. You can ask the gypsy lass, Catarina, yourself. Canmore wanted to align his family with ours and sought to trick her and me."

  Ewan laughed bitterly at that. "But the trick it seems is on him since he promised her to Ryan, who won't release her from the betrothal. So you see, it was all a buggering waste of time."

  "Ewan!" his mother snapped. "You watch your mouth."

  He clenched his teeth and bit back the nasty retort he longed to utter. Angry though he was, he wouldn't hurt his mother by his nastiness.

  Ewan started to pour more ale, but Lochlan stopped him by covering the goblet with his hand.

  Lochlan gave a hard stare at Sin, Braden and their mother. "Could you leave us alone?"

  They withdrew reluctantly.

  Lochlan took the goblet from him.

  Ewan growled, but as usual his brother ignored him and pushed his hand away when he sought to reclaim the goblet.

  "I need you sober a bit longer to explain this to me. Her father is outside ready to tear this clan apart and to bring the kings of both Scotland and England down on our heads unless you do right by his daughter. Now tell me why it is she has been traveling alone with you."

  Ewan glared at his older brother. He didn't need this lecture and he hated being toyed with. Alexander's plan had been ill laid, and now all he wanted was time alone to forget his part in the whole debacle. "I told you everything."

  "You've told me nothing."

  "Ewan?"

  Ewan closed his eyes and clenched his teeth at the sound of his name on Nora's lips. It tore through him.

  He couldn't face her now. Not here in this hall where he had once fought Kieran over possession of Isobail.

  He picked up the pitcher of ale and headed toward the stairs. "I want to be alone."

  He had barely taken a step before Nora rushed forward and planted herself firmly in his path.

  He felt his jaw twitch at her actions. "Move, Nora."

  She stood there unflinching with her hands on her hips. "Or what?"

  "I'll move you out of my way."

  She lifted her chin defiantly as she obviously brac
ed herself to face him. "You wouldn't dare."

  Tired, angry, heartbroken and filled with physical and mental agony, he was in no mood for her challenges.

  Setting the ale aside, he faced her. He knew his mother, brothers and her parents were watching them, but he was past the point of caring.

  Damn all of them.

  And damn anyone who got between him and those stairs…

  Nora gasped as Ewan actually tossed her over his shoulder and headed away from the stairs.

  "What are you doing?" her father demanded.

  "I'm removing the obstacle from my path." Ewan sat her down in Lochlan's padded chair by the hearth.

  Nora sat stunned for a moment, unable to believe he had done this.

  Granted, he had set her down easily, but still.

  How dare he!

  "You're bleeding again," Nora gasped as he moved away from her, and headed back toward his ale.

  "Aye, I know, and all I want is to lie down and drink."

  She stiffened. "You can't drink while lying down."

  He cast her a feral glare over his shoulder, grabbed the pitcher and headed for the stairs.

  This time it was Lochlan who blocked his way.

  Ewan sighed disgustedly. "Will I have to move you one by one?"

  "Why are you bleeding?"

  "Graham stabbed him," Nora explained as she rejoined them by the stairs. "Ewan has refused to let anyone tend the wound for days."

  "I don't need your coddling," Ewan snarled.

  He shoved Lochlan aside roughly.

  Lochlan caught his arm and pulled him away from the stairs.

  Ewan swung at him, but the pain from his arm was such that he staggered back from it.

  The next thing he knew, Lochlan had his hand on his forehead. "You're burning with fever."

  Ewan struggled to breathe. He just wanted to lie down and forget the past week with Nora.

  He wanted the pain inside him to stop.

  All he felt was agony. Bitter and aching, it tore through him.

  Nora was lost to him.

  Honestly, he just wanted to die.

  Knocking Lochlan's hand away, he took a step and felt the room spin out from under him.

  Nora gasped as Ewan sank to the floor. The pitcher skittered across the cobblestones as he knelt down, and his mother rushed toward him.

  He collapsed a moment later.